and do not put your mouth on them.

It’s hard these day to read any blog, online articles, or even books where the author claims to show a loving outlook on their own enemies. Sadly, they have it backwards when they state, “What your enemies don’t understand is: Every time they put their mouths on you it moves God’s hand in you favor.” First, let’s search out what this writer is stating. She is clearly referring to some special favor we have with God. “Now Peter was speaking and say; now I know God does not show favor; God is no respecter of persons.” Acts 10:34. Historically, this scripture was about God using the Apostle Peter to go to gentiles and preach the gospel, but if we recognize that God shows no partiality to anyone, then the argument could be made that God does not show any group of people favor above another. Therefore, the authors statement is false in terms of “God shows more favor to us when our enemies treat us wrongly,” is a false narrative proposed by the author. However, this isn’t completely her fault because I know where this author was taught this idea. Therefore, we come to the second issue in our discussion. Who we follow as our authority makes a great deal of difference in how we perceive our circumstances. Solmon, David’s son stated this about his enemies, “Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, and let not your heart rejoice when he stumbles” Proverbs 24:17, yet another scripture states this “If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat, and if he is thirsty give him water to drink.” Proverbs 25:21. Solmon was given great wisdom from God in order to rule the kingdom of Israel rightly. Which leads to why it is so important to test those who are in authority.

            False teachers are everywhere and it is very important to make sure we test everything we are taught by these teachers. Even the ones who teach the truth are to be tested. We know this by what the Apostle Paul states about the Bereans. “Now the brothers sent Paul and Salis away by night to Berea, and when they arrived they went into the Jewish synagogue. Now these Jews were more noble than those in Thessalonica: they received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so. Many of them believed, but not just a few Greek women of high standing as well as men.” Acts 17:10-12. If the Bereans were noble about their researching what scriptures Paul and Salis preached, we should be doing the same thing in our day and time. As a matter of fact, even the Apostle John says this; “Beloved do not believe every spirit but test every spirit to see whether it is from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.” 1John 4:1(ESV). It is very important that we test every man and women who says they have come in the name of God.

            Let us parcel out this train of thought which is stated in the article, “God shows more favor when our enemies treat us wrongly.” Does God show us favor or is he no respecter of persons? Which statement are you going to believe? The Bible which is spirit breathed through human authors or a psychological statement, which is a restatement of false teacher? We have read scripture in the bible and have clearly defined what God says about how we should treat our fellow man who is speaking against us. The man who is malicious isn’t our enemy, it is the spirit with which he is operating in. We should treat men with respect, but not so as to tolerate their sins. Should we feed our enemies and give them drink when they are thirsty? Yes, according to Proverbs we should treat them as we want to be treated Matthew 7:12. The golden rule is to treat one another as we would want to be treated. If I speak against someone who is my enemy, I am in just as much at fault for being malicious by making statements like, “if your enemy puts his or her mouth on you, God will work in your favor.” God isn’t going to go against his word by showing us favor for an act he clearly states, “Let all bitterness and wrath, and anger and clamor, and slander, be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31-32. Does this mean we have to forgive our enemies even if they are not of Christ? Yes, we are to forgive those who are not in Christ. Forgiveness isn’t making popular psychological statements about how you are highly favored by God, when your enemies put their mouths on you or ruin your character. Instead we are to humble ourselves, forgive our enemies because by doing so you heap coals upon their heads.” Romans 12:20. Again, Jesus states this in Luke “If you love others who love you, what benefit is it to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to others who do good to you, for what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. If you lend to others whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good and lend expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great and will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your father is merciful. “Luke 6:32-42.

            I personally know how hard it is to forgive people in your life. I believe we all do and it can be hard. I recently forgave the family who killed my cousin Renee, her daughter Tabitha, and my cousin Leon’s wife Wendy. In the early 1990’s I had the privilege to meet apart of my dad’s family and was establishing a relationship with them, when one day Renee, Tabitha, and Wendy went missing. None of us could have contemplated what had happened to them that evening at a Walmart parking lot. My cousin Renee was supposed to meet her ex-husband so he could see their daughter, Wendy was with them for support. Only they never returned home from their visit. In 2018, police found the bodies of my cousins in the backyard of my cousin Renee’s ex-husband’s mother’s house. I didn’t know that they had found them until September 0f 2020, when Pastor David Oxley Sr. told me that he had officiated their funerals and then contacted another member of my family to tell me the details of their murder. My heart broke in two hearing those details over the phone as sister Kaye Oxley comforted me in their home. It took me some time to realize just how angry I was that my family had to suffer for someone else’s hatred. However, I have indeed forgiven my cousin Renee’s ex-husband and his mother, even though they are both deceased. There are many people I’ve had to forgive within my family and those who just didn’t like me. It took time, but when you’re walking in obedience to scripture it means you want to be obedient to God even when were directed to forgive others 70 times 7. “And, then Peter came up and said to him, Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Matthew 18:21-22. If we look even closer to what Jesus taught, he even gave us how to pray for our enemies and to forgive them (The Lords Prayer Matthew 6:21), even in Genesis 4:24 states that we should forgive seventy times seven. However, as humans we have a habit of bringing up past hurts and that means we need to continually forgive with no number in sight.

            Does this mean we should let the person back into our lives? Well, let’s use some wisdom. If I had run across the persons who killed my cousins and they had not been caught and I had full knowledge of what they had done. If they needed water and food, I would give it to them at the risk of my own life. Would I be afraid that they could kill me too? Yes, but my life is of no consequence to ministering to the needs of people who have need of mercy and compassion. If you had asked me this five years ago, no the answer would not be the same. The reason, because five years ago I wasn’t walking in obedience to the word of God. At the time I was off partying, drinking, and in a homosexual relationship with a woman I had no business being involved with. Which leads to how I came to understand God’s commandment to forgive. In late 2018 my ex-girlfriend and I were struggling with our relationship. I was living with her in an apartment in Charlotte, NC at the time. I had become suspicious of her activities after we both lost our jobs at an assisted living center. I was already suspicious long before that because of some things she told me that I found out weren’t true after the fact. Money became another issue as we continued to argue over the payment of our cellphones that I placed under my name with Sprint. We had just received our new Samsung Galaxy S9 androids when we lost our jobs due to some unforeseen circumstances at work. She would never confirm her whereabouts when I’d ask her and that caused me to start questioning her again. On top of all of that, by 2019 we broke up and I started a new job with a local hospital as a food server on the fourth floor in Medsurg. I met some very nice Certified Nursing Aids and nurses who often helped me when I was in need. However, during this time I went to visit with my ex-girlfriends best gay friend because he asked to see me. It was then he spelled it all out to me that she had not been faithful since the start of our relationship. My heart broke in two then, but for a completely different reason. She had defiled her promise to me that I was the only one and that she had broken communications with several women she was talking too. I also figured out that the money she stated she was giving to a relative wasn’t at all true. I was already angry that I had given up my whole family for her including some good friends that I cared about deeply. After our breakup I went through a long run of health issues with Clinical depression, Anxiety, and Pancreatitis. I had these issues long before she came into my life, but failed to deal with the Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder I had been diagnosed with in high school during another family situation in which a friend claimed my brother had raped her and then on the day of our senior breakfast confessed that she had lied about it in front of nearly the whole senior class. Therefore, my behavior went from bad to extreme and I had no one to blame but myself. In February of 2020 I tried to commit suicide and during my stay at the mental health hospital it was found that I had Clinical Depression and General Anxiety Disorder. They placed me on medications for those diagnoses and sent me to a psychiatrist in Charlotte, NC. However, it would take going back and reading my bible to finally break me of my unforgiveness. I was still living with my ex-girlfriend after my diagnosis, and it took everything in me to forgive her for being unfaithful but also lying to me about many other things. In March of 2020 everything closed down due to Covid-19, I lost my new job and by June of 2020 my ex told me that we would both have to move out by October of 2020 due to financial changes that her mom and us had incurred due to the loss of income. However, I was always certain that it was because she had another relationship and was ready to move forward with that person. I forgave my ex and moved on back to Bethany, Oklahoma where again I would be situated to forgive everyone from my past who had hurt me. It took me two years to realize how important it is to forgive and be forgiven.

            After finding out about the murders I really had to come to grips with my unforgiveness of others within my family and that took me to the brink of my Clinical Depression I didn’t want anyone else to know about. I often pushed people who cared about me away and then one afternoon I received a phone call from a new friend who had gone down a similar road as I did. She had been attending a women’s group, so I was told, and she wanted me to come to one of their outreaches. I was already part of a church family, and I was determined to remain within that family because I simply had no one else. My mom and I were mending our past relationship, my brother and I began talking again and I was able to see him briefly, and my little sister and I finally got together in late 2021. I decided I needed help healing from the past, so I began to attend this women’s group. I should have run as soon as I found out that they use Kenneth Hagan’s and Kenneth Copeland’s books to teach their boot camps. After I had attended a few months and was at a New Years Eve worship service at one of the members houses something in me changed. I hadn’t been home, a few hours when I received a notification to pray for the group that went to California for the Rose Bowl. Something felt off about the message and it was then I started to dive even deeper into scripture about biblical authority in which I should follow. After about a few weeks I stopped listening to Kim Jones aka Real Talk Kim, Steven Furtick, and many others I thought were teaching scripture within context. When I found out they weren’t I became angry with myself that I had not shown good discernment since I had been back to Oklahoma. One night as I was looking through YouTube, I was sent a notification from another YouTuber (Melessia Daughtery and Alisa Childers) I had begun watching, the notification was you might like this too Justin Peters Clouds without waters. The message was women as pastors, and I listened. It took me about two days to climb out of my despair to realize God was getting my attention on the matter of Biblical truth. I fell to my knees and repented for my part in leading others to believe in false teachings by posting my own representations of scripture instead of scripture within context. It took me all but a few hours to put together a posting on Facebook about False teachers, the New Apostolic Reformation, and other such teaching like Gnostics, Mysticism, and New Age. All of which I had been complacent in for most of my life without even knowing I had been taught these things while living at home. Again, another matter I had to face with time.  

            Within the months that followed I found myself losing my apartment and back working for a local hospital, only this time I was in housekeeping cleaning Post-op, Pre-Op and the PACU. During my time at the hospital I spent time listening to every possible Apologetic YouTuber I could find within the confounds of biblical truth. I found myself listening for over eight hours of Alisa Childers, Melissa Daughtry, Justin Peters, John McAuthor, and eventually the Messed up Church By Steve Kozar and his wife Paulette. From there I started listening to Pastor Chris Roseborough of Fighting for the Faith and Pirate Christian Radio. I was drawn to the truth and it would eventually lead me to start a site in WordPress called Waking Up Berean. Because I simply had awakened to the awareness that I had been going down the wide path and was blissfully unaware of the false teachings I had been apart of. Many times I have tried to stop posting videos and others postings about false teachings, but I simply cannot stop since I love everyone and care where they go in the end. I have learned to forgive my enemies, family, and old friends as I have learned just how much God has forgiven me.